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Tuesday, July 5, 2022

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Business

McDonald’s launches new specialty – low-calorie apples

“Low-calorie apples are just the start,” McDonald's confirmed. The British variety will enter the market after the Brexit transition and will be “a semi-healthy option”, in which 'semi' means “incredibly healthy” in American English.

Huge 6,7” iPhone 12 will come with 24 camera lenses to make sure company stays competitive and innovative

The company that invented hugely successful AirPower and stands behind the success of explodingly explosive MacBook batteries and bending iPhone 6's has got the next big thing.

Latest Nonsense

SOLUTION: The homeless could buy themselves houses, Luke Hall suggests

After suggesting that rough sleepers could move in with their family or friends, Luke Hall, homelessness minister, admits that that was perhaps a little too rational on his part.

U-turns to be included in the next Tory manifesto

The next Conservative manifesto will also restore public trust, boost affordable housing, reinstate Public Health England, bring people back from the dead (Thatcher) and James Cleverly's and Priti Patel's favourite: make Ben and Jerry's ice cream less expensive.

Johnson takes back control from PM Cummings

A major overhaul in the cabinet will change the entire approach to the pandemic, run by two centrally-run committees, the Telegraph reports. The committees will cover both strategic fuck-ups and operational denial.

Police brutality reaches new highs & low hopes

Police brutality in the United Shtates of America looks far worse than this.

Huge 6,7” iPhone 12 will come with 24 camera lenses to make sure company stays competitive and innovative

The company that invented hugely successful AirPower and stands behind the success of explodingly explosive MacBook batteries and bending iPhone 6's has got the next big thing.